In this article, I will be sharing suggestions to make time out or planning ahead more effective for you and your toddler.
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Time Out
3.Tips to make Time Out more effective
1. Do not give attention to the toddler. 2. Stay Calm. 3. Keep Time Out or Quiet Time short.
4. Start afresh when Time Out is over.
Praise the toddler if the toddler behaves well.
Do not remind the toddler what he did wrong.
5. Follow through.
Let the toddler knows how he behaves is unacceptable and will always get Time Out or Quiet Time.
6. Be Consistent
Discuss with your spouse to use Time Out in the same way for the same behaviour despite of different locations like home, childcare.
Inform the childcare teachers too.
Give Time Out or Quiet Time to the toddler who doesn’t stop behaving after warning.
Visit here for more details on “Manage Toddler's Behaviours Part 2”.
Four Common Time Out Problems and Solutions
1. Refusing to go to Time Out.
If the toddler is young, let him choose to walk to time out on his own or the parent carry him.
Buy and offer the toddler a calm down jar. Ask him to watch it and calm down.
Talk to the toddler after glitter is calm.
2. Challenging behaviour in Time Out or Quiet Time.
Let the toddler know the reason for putting him in time out or quiet time.
For example,
Hitting someone is unacceptable. If you hit, I will stop you and you will sit on my lap until you calm down.
Remind the toddler time out begins when the toddler is quiet.
If the toddler’s behaviour becomes challenging before time out or quiet time is finished, will start time out again.
3. Repeatedly leaving Quiet Time.
Put the toddler into a room, shut the door and leave.
4. Time Out is not working.
Understand the reason behind the behaviour.
If the toddler is having strong feelings, helping the toddler work through emotions can make it easier to change the toddler’s
behaviour.
Praise the toddler when the toddler behaves well.
Use Changing the environment to improve the toddler’s behaviour. For example, if the toddler misbehaves when he is tired, plan to do the grocery shopping after he had an afternoon nap.
Use Consequences. For example, if the toddler won’t go into time out or quiet time, tell the toddler to go into time out now or he will not be able to go the playground to play.
Seek professional help if have tried many behaviour tools.
Planning Ahead
Source: Unsplash
1. Identify challenging situations.
Avoid the situation or ask someone to help.
For example, you could do your grocery shopping online instead of going to the shops or you could ask someone to look
after your toddler while you shop.
If the situation can’t be avoided, or if you think it might help if your toddler learns how to cope better in the situation,
planning ahead might help you.
You might find it helpful to read more about how you can encourage good behaviour by changing your toddler’s
environment.
2. Make expectations clear.
Talk with your toddler before going into a challenging situation. Let your toddler know what you expect and what behaviour is OK.
Set simple rules clearly.
For example, rules for a shopping trip: no requesting or pestering to buy things. If this happens, we will leave for home. If the toddler behave well, we will pack the toddler’s favourite food home to eat for a meal. Check the toddler understands what you expect.
3. Think of the toddler as a learner.
Work out what skills the toddler needs to learn. Give the toddler lots of opportunities to practise and succeed in easier situations.
Praise the toddler when the toddler gets it right.
Think about when the toddler is likely to be at his best.
Plan challenging situations around the toddler’s routine.
For example, try to make appointments after the toddler’s nap or snack.
4. Plan activities that will keep the toddler busy and engaged.
Have a ‘going-out bag’ ready, with a drink, a snack, a small and interesting toy or a book.
5. Encourage good behaviour.
Praise the toddler for good behaviour.
For example, during a shopping trip, praise the toddler for staying close and helping to find items.
6. Have a follow-up talk.
Praise the toddler on things that he did well.
Point out one or two things the toddler might do differently as goals to achieve next round.
I hope all these suggestions will help you in managing your toddler’s behaviour and the toddler will behave better.
Click here to read about "Toddler Development" and "How can Parents help".
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Blk 433 Tampines Street 43 #01-63/65 Singapore 520433
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